They Mustn't Get Me

Running.

That was all I'd been doing for countless hours.

Running.

They can't get me.

They mustn't get me.

My legs were exhausted. My heart was pounding, lungs struggling to hold oxygen. My muscles screamed for me to stop but my brain urged me to keep going. To find shelter. I couldn't stop.

They mustn't get me.

The otherwise ethereal forest seemed sinister at this time of the night. There was no moon to illuminate the path for me. How big was the forest? I should've been out of it ages ago. Something was wrong. But I couldn't stop to observe my surroundings. I couldn't stop running.

They mustn't get me.

Fatigue forced me to slow my pace. Images of the things flashed through my mind over and over. Tall creatures with hides dark as the night itself, hunched over, arms dragging in the ground, claws longer than their hands leaving scores in the dirt. Their faces; they lacked eyes, but had mouths filled with teeth longer human fingers and sharper than razor blades. Tails so powerful, one whip could break every bone in a man's body. I had to keep going.

They mustn't get me.

These were beasts that had the aura of being around far longer than any creature on earth; almost as old as the earth itself. Primitive creatures driven by insane bloodlust. I could see them rip apart my neighborhood before my eyes again. Throats torn, organs punctured; crimson everywhere. Not a single part went to waste. They devoured everything down to the bone. The memories gave me a brief surge of adrenaline and I started to run faster.

They mustn't get me.

It was not long before I started to slow again. I could not stop but my legs would take me no further. Tears welled in my eyes. The forest was unfamiliar and unending. Was I caught in their trap? Was this an illusion created by them? I knew not what bounds their powers reached. I climbed up the tallest tree I could find. Their footsteps approached the area I was hiding; they had had no trouble catching up. Perhaps they were toying with me.

They might get me.

One of the creatures let out an unnatural sound, one that cannot be compared to anything a human has ever heard. It resonated in my head even after there was silence. It stood under the branch I was desperately clinging to. I prayed the thick foliage would hide me. It screeched again and two others joined it. Did they have an impeccable sense of smell? If so, there was no way I was safe.

Without warning, one of the creatures swiped it's claws against the trunk of my tree with immense speed. There was the deafening sound of wood splintering and I felt the tree along with myself falling. The ground rushed up at me. I was in excruciating pain. My arm was twisted in a horrible angle, I could see the broken bone jutting out of my skin. My legs were stuck under a network of thick branches, blood oozing out from several cuts. If they hadn't smelled me before, they definitely did now. The scent of blood must have reached them, for their cries turned to excitement. They began scrabbling at the foliage, eager to get at their prey, ripping away branches like they were mere twigs. I closed my eyes and waited. They were going to get me. I felt the hot, putrid breaths on the skin of my face.

They had me.

Strength

'It's only a little cut,' I think to myself, the first time I pull out a knife. 'That's it, just a little one to numb the pain.'

That's how it starts. That's what we think. 'Just one little chocolate', 'Just another minute', 'Maybe just one more cut'. It's never just one more. It never stops.

Grab a blade, a knife, a sharp object. Put it to your skin. Pull it through. Feel the sting. Pull it across a second time. A third. Watch the blood slowly pool out. Feels good doesn't it?

Now think about your best friend, your boyfriend, girlfriend, sibling, parent. Think about how all they've tried to do is get you to stop. They may not understand what you're going through. What compels you to do such a thing. But do you give a thought to them when you ruin your arm? Think about what it does to them. This is only the beginning. One fine day, you're going to be dead. Think about them crying around your body with blood pooling around you. One day, you're going to cut too deep and that's going to be the end of you.

"I try, I really do," I know you do. I know how hard it is to stop. But let the one boy whose smile you see everyday keep you going. Let that simple action give you the strength to stop. Think about how you have to see it the next day. He may not know he's what propels you on, but to you, he's more than the universe. Let that be your reason to live. The girl who's eyes are brightest, most beautiful things you see. Her incredible laugh. Stop for that. The people around you who love you. Stop for them.

They care for you.

Stop because there's more to life than just that little phase of depression. Yes, it seems like the world is only trying to pull you down and you feel worthless and just want to end it all. But be strong. You'll make it through. And it's worth the fight. The light you see at the end of your struggle will be the most awesome sight. An amazing feeling of freedom. A load off your shoulders. And at the end of the tunnel, you will emerge a better, stronger person.

Pain

You feel horrible. Your insides feel like they don't function anymore. You lose your appetite for everything. You don't eat for days.

It hurts.

You don't want to talk to anyone. Shut yourself away. Isolate yourself. Cry all alone.

But at the same time you want the people closest to you to hold you and talk to you and tell you everything will be okay.

You're with your closest friend. He can see you're hurt. You're holding everything in. You tell him everything's okay. It's not. You're breaking down inside, every wall of strength you built up is crumbling down.

He can tell, even if you don't let him know. He puts an arm around you. Holds you tight. Gets past your defenses. A tear leaks out of your eye.

"Hey, no, don't cry," he says. That's it. Those words. They make the dam finally break. Your tears stream out, hot and unstoppable. He hugs you tighter. You can't control yourself. It's the fact that someone cares enough, loves you so much that finally destroys you.

You tried to be alone, to keep the pain to yourself, hold it in and deal with it yourself. But the presence of that one significant person demolishes the pillars you so painfully put up. Strips away all the layers of self defense you put up.

You melt in their arms. That is now your world. It comforts you, surrounds you. Gives you the warmth and love you needed.

You cry yourself dry. You let all the pain out. You feel much better.

They're there for you.
You're loved.
You don't have to deal with things alone.

Loathe

Isolation.
Silence.
Calm.
Peace.

A moon shining down bright and fierce. The sound of a train honking in the distance. Warmth radiating from the fire by which I lay. The sleek body of a cat curled up again my stomach. Owls hooting right outside the window open to the night.

The cold breeze tickled me all over, comforting me. Along with the gentle crackling of the flames and purring of my feline companion, I drifted into a hypnagogic state, as one with insomnia might experience.

All was calm until it happened. A slender figure looking in through the window. It's facial features unclear. Stuck one long, bony leg through the gaping hole, followed by the other. Its arms were long and brushed the ground, its hands not hands, but grotesque claws. I tried to get up, but it was impossible. My body seemed to be stuck to ground. I was unable to move.

The thing approached me, it's face forming as it got closer. Empty eye sockets, a mouth twisted into the most inhumane shape, gaping holes in the sides of its face with rows of dagger-like teeth sticking out. I was frozen with fear. The thing was now hovering right next to my body, towering high above me. It brought its face down to mine and I could smell the stench of death.

I opened my mouth to scream but not a sound came out. My legs seemed to have been made of lead, I could not escape the fear that was rapidly eating away at me. The monster brought a claw to my face and poked it. It let out a low growl, then threw its head back and screeched into the night. Within seconds, one more monster, much like the first, stood in the room.

My heart was racing, it felt as though it may burst out of my rib cage at any moment. I thought for sure that my life was going to end then. The second monster rapidly opened and closed its claws making an uncomfortable clicking noise that set my nerves on end. Soon the first joined it. My eyes turned towards the window and what I saw scarred me. I would never forget that face, indescribable, eyes glowing red with such hatred and loathing, a look itself would have one wincing with pain.
I heard a low chanting begin, echoing all around me. The two monsters bared their rows of teeth and let out sounds never heard before by human ears. I wanted to cry, I could feel the tears held back by an invisible dam, my throat was locked, I couldn't breathe.

The first monster lowered its face to mine and parted its jaws. I saw into its mouth, a pitch black hole from which there was no return. I knew I was done for. But at that moment, the monsters just vanished into dust. I looked around, everything was normal. The cat was awake and licking my cheek. The fire lent me warmth and calmed me down. I could breathe once more. I lay on my back till my heartbeat was regular again. Propping myself up on my elbows, I stroked the cat and kissed her forehead. Thought about how sleep paralysis is a horrible thing to experience.

I sat myself up and breathed in the fresh night air. There was a rustle at the window and I turned to look.

The evil figure with the red eyes was still there, the loathing just as strong.

Drifting

And so I drifted across the desolate, barren void. Darkness surrounded me on all sides, the cold setting deep into my bones.

Of course, without a space suit I ought to have been destroyed instantly, exposed to radiations and negligible pressure. But this felt surreal; so dreamlike, yet I was living the moment as if awake.

A lone, sentient being, drifting across that forlorn void, light from stars millions of lightyears away reaching my eyes after, who knows, billions of years.

Drifting endlessly, no beginning, no destination.

I came upon a system of planets orbiting a dying star, over fifty times the size of our beloved sun. A black hole was inevitable. The planets surrounding it were inhabitable and melancholy, yet the entire scenery was mesmerizing.

Drifting further, no place to go.

And all of a sudden, I was a speck outside a bubble, and it was as if someone had pushed a fast-forward button inside that bubble. The planets seemed to revolve around the star the same way you'd see electrons revolving around a nucleus in the atomic model. The star used up all its energy until the gravity was far too strong to be counteracted. At that moment, whatever controlled the epic bubble had hit the play button.

Drifting around, safe outside the bubble.

And then it happened.
The star exploded in a spectacular supernova and the gravity pulled the mass of star inwards, crushing it into a singularity with infinite density; all at once. The supernova explosion devoured the planets orbiting closest to late star.

The black hole was formed. The bubble of space dissolved.

Drifting along the unaffected dwarf planets.

A miraculous sight, etched into my memory forever.

Hush

The underground subway station was abandoned; it hadn't been used for years, but for one girl, she liked to spend her nights there. The darkness, the isolation, they made her feel powerful. She was one with her demons in that dingy cave.

Both sides of the tunnel were blocked; the walls had caved in, allowing for very little moonlight to pass through in broken beams. They cast odd, menacing shadows on the ground. That night, the girl sneaked in past the 'Do Not Enter' barriers and lightly shut the door.

She walked down the stairs, embracing the darkness so heavy, it was near impossible to see. But not for this young adolescent. She stood in the center of the platform, closed her eyes and leaned back, took off her thick coat and dropped it beside her. She spread her arms out and stood there in that uncanny stance for a few minutes, before shadows darker than the blackness of the tunnel began to creep up her ankles.

She opened her eyes, no whites, the black as deep as the shadows that engulfed her. "You have come," she whispered in an eerie calm, "My demons."

They got stronger with each visit of hers. They fed on her, and in return gave her that fleeting sense of power that lingered long after she was gone.

The Shadows were now up to her neck.

A guard opened the door and shone his torch down into the station, illuminating her. She turned and bared her teeth at him, sharp as daggers, long as fingers. Her jaws parted unnaturally wide, the Shadows seeping into her eyes.

The guard dropped his torch and stumbled backwards, nearly tripping in his shaky attempts to get out of there. His mouth opened in a soundless scream as he fled the station.

"Hush, my children. He does not need to be killed. No one will ever believe him," she calmed the arguing voices in her head. Her voice was soft, almost blending with the silence, "No one will ever find us."

What Are We?

"That's it then? That's all we are? Just friends? No wait. We're not even friends. Not after the way you've been these last few days. Do you even remember who I am?" she threw her hands in the air, on the verge of tears.

He just stood there, not knowing what to say, for she was right. He took his glasses off, wiped them a bit and put them back on, but never once did he look her in the eye.

"I mean, after everything we've done. You were the closest thing I had to family. You were the only person there for me, every time. I had no one but you to turn to. It was you who made me feel true happiness once again. I'd forgotten until I met you. Now you've just left me feeling even more empty than I first had."

"I.." was all he could manage to say.

"And you know the worse part? I loved you. I loved you more than any person ever could. I was stupid. I trusted you. And people I trust always break my heart. I hate you. Hate you for making me fall for you with your.. your cheesy lines and your charming smile. But I hate myself more, for being blind. How could I have loved you?" she dropped her head into her hands, letting the tears flow out. The droplets stained the lenses on her spectacles so when she looked back up at him, all she saw was a fuzzy outline. Unable to bear looking at the face of the one who had betrayed her, she turned away.

He got up to console her, but thought better of it when the girl stiffened at the sound of his approaching footsteps. "I'm so sorry.. For everything. I really am," having said that, he opened the door and walked out of her life forever.

Goodbyes Hurt

So there they were, standing, doing nothing really. They'd go their separate ways. They'd vowed never to meet again. It was a bit of a mutual unspoken decision. They couldn't do anything about it. What could they?

As she stood there in the rain, letting it run through her hair and down the side of her face, she turned to him. He was already looking at her. All the moments they had had together came rushing back, and it sparked between them like lightning. The departure was painful. It was something they didn't want to do.

"So this is it then? We're never going to meet ever?" she said, her voice cracking.

He shook his head. "No, I'm afraid not. I don't like this. I don't want to forget you, forget all the times we had."

She whispered back, "Neither do I, but it's for our good. I love you, I hope you know that."

"I know, and the same goes for you," he took her in his arms, trying hard not to cry.

"Goodbye," she cried into his already wet shirt.

"Goodbye," he kissed her forehead.

They walked away in opposite directions, never looking back.

A Lonely Place

It was a stormy winter night, dark and eerie. A narrow path with tall buildings on either side, shadows covering whatever little light there was. It made my spine tingle. I had a creepy feeling that something evil was lurking in the shadows. I looked around, there was nothing to see but crumbling walls with peeled off paint and shattered windows. Something terrible had happened along ago, I didn't even want to think about it. As I walked down the dark, desolate street, I suddenly heard a sound. I almost froze, it sounded like someone was follwing me. This was surely not a place where one wanted to encounter another being. There was no one I could call out to for help to save me from whoever was behind. The sound got louder and echoed softly in the narrow alley. I stopped myself from turning around. Forced myself to go on walking. My heart was pounding and the survival instinct took over. I pushed open the door of a large tower that looked like it might have once been an swank office and rushed in. Whoever or whatever was behind me followed into the once luxurious lobby. There was the sound of sharpening of knives. Or was it teeth? I still wasn't sure if it was an animal or a human. It could have been a hybrid, the kind of mutation that is dreaded the most. I hurried up the stairs and hid. It got quiet after a while, I strained to hear but suddenly the sounds had stopped. There was an eerie silence now. Where could thing have gone? Perhaps hiding somewhere, ready to pounce on me when I least expect it. Or maybe it was just gone. I remember stories of how the ghosts of experiments gone wrong roamed these areas at night. Perhaps that was what had been following me, one of the lonely souls. I suppose I was lucky enough not to be killed, as many other unfortunate people.

People stick to themselves. No one has any friends. No community or society, it's quite a lonely world now.

Here, in the year 7307, no one and nothing is ever safe.